The Most Putrid Thing in New Orleans

The most putrid thing in New Orleans won't make you sick, necessarily, but it may make you queasy.  I'm not going to describe the most putrid thing in New Orleans.  If I did, you wouldn't be able to read to the end.  Instead, I will just provide hints of what the most putrid thing in New Orleans might be.  Believe me, it's a doozie.  Use your imagination.  That won't be enough.

Flowers grow in profusion in New Orleans.

Trust your senses in New Orleans.  What are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?  Your own nose?  The knot in your stomach?  The loud beat-beat-beat of your telltale heart?  

Use your best intuition; visit New Orleans like you mean it and then buckle up---it's going to be a wild ride.

New Orleans is good.  There is very little that is truly, truly putrid in New Orleans.  Like finding phlegm in a public toilet bowl, you expect to find a lot worse in New Orleans.  What goes around comes around and everything comes up oleander and crepe myrtle in New Orleans.  If the worst you carry back home when you leave New Orleans is good memories, that'll be better than a hangover, syphilis, or an empty bank account.  

Most people leave New Orleans with their heads and their hearts stuffed full of good memories.

This isn't a haunted house, it's a New Orleans house in our neighborhood.

You will most likely find the most putrid thing in New Orleans in the French Quarter.  Where else would it be?  Watch your step.  If you step in it, it will raise a stink to the top of the twin bell towers of St. Louis Cathedral.  It will be squishy and slimy and gelatinous, like something out of an H.P. Lovecraft story.  It will contain bits of half-digested----stuff, there is no other way to describe it, animal, vegetable, or sewage.  

If this doesn't whet your appetite to explore New Orleans, nothing will.  The most putrid thing in New Orleans never visits our neighborhood.  I've walked around the most putrid thing in New Orleans in the French Quarter but I've never even seen it more lakeside than Burgundy Street, and that was where St. Ann Street crosses Burgundy.  What a mess that was.  Burgundy Street is pronounced bur-GUN-dee.

In our part of New Orleans, all is pleasant and nothing is putrid.  Who would choose to live in a city that's a cesspool?  Every New Orleanian loves where we live.  We live here by choice.  We don't regret that choice.  There is no other city in the world so great as New Orleans.  You'll see when you visit.

Don't forget to check out our sponsor's blog after you've spent enough time steeping yourself in The Authentic New Orleans State of Mind on this blog.  When you are ready to visit nocturnal New Orleans, you know where to stay: La Belle Esplanade.