What's it like to stay in a B&B?

A small view of our breakfast buffet

People who stay with us sometimes ask beforehand how we compare to other B&Bs in New Orleans, or other B&Bs elsewhere. I've gotta be honest: we don't know.  

The bed and breakfast industry is made up of small owner-occupied-and-managed eccentrically individual inns, each with its own personality.  No two are alike.  I read a lot of reviews in my line of work.  

If you're planning to stay in a B&B, you should read a lot of reviews, too.  Individually, the reviews don't tell you much.  Every place is great!  Read enough of them, and you can discern a pattern of what each place offers, though.  Sometimes, the bed and the sheets set a place apart.  If that's important to you, stay there.  Sometimes, it's the breakfast.  Sometimes, most of the time, it's the hosts.  Good hosts make good company the way good guests make good company.  If a B&B has a dead blog, it's probably running on autopilot...like a chain hotel resting on its reputation or its brand.

As of this writing, we have 132 reviews on Trip Advisor.  That's pretty respectable for being open only two years (October 2014 marks our entry into our third year of being open for business).  I look at other New Orleans B&Bs and see that some have over 300 or 500 or 600 reviews and I think, "Boy, we're still pretty green."  Then I see that those 600 reviews go back more than ten years.  I guess 132 reviews in two years is pretty impressive.  We're still green, but that only means we're still enthusiastic about our profession.  We love what we do.

I'm waiting for somebody to rate us "Terrible."  No stars.  "La Belle Esplanade sucks."  We don't serve dry cereal for breakfast.  No Kellogg's Raisin Bran.  Nobody eats it and we end up throwing it away.  And, we don't offer other things we don't advertise.  No hot tub.  There's no ADA compliant ramp to the front door of our historic district mansion.  The city won't let us install one.  There's no elevator to the second floor.  There aren't any grab bars in the antique claw foot tub.  We don't serve breakfast in bed.  You have to come get breakfast yourself and take it to your suite yourself.  (We don't mind if you do.)  We don't offer in-house dry cleaning, though we do have coin-operated laundry facilities on the premises.  

We have tried to anticipate every need but we can't anticipate every contingency or flight of imaginative fancy.  If you ever have a question about what we offer, please ask in advance.  We sometimes serve sausage for breakfast.  If a guest chooses to tell us they are vegetarian for the first time when they sit down for breakfast as we are putting an artfully arranged sausage plate in front of them, we apologize for not knowing this in advance, but, really, how could we?  Most people aren't vegetarian and most people are happy with what we serve.  We do scramble to serve something different, and special, for that person the next day.

It's going to happen some day.  The 1*, one-star, poor-service, crummy inn, review is coming, like a buzzard that circles a fat calf in a field hoping it trips and can't run away.  Easy pickings.  Somebody is going to complain that we didn't accommodate them in some way, and they won't tell us while they're here, and we won't know how we could make their visit to New Orleans better until we read that dreaded review online, after the fact, posted for all the world to see.  Ha-ha!

I can't say that I stay up at night wondering how I'll respond to that review when it comes, but I know it's coming.  I'm sure it's going to be a doozy.  If you are reading this blog before you stay with us, don't be that person.  We do whatever we can to make you feel at home.  It's our home, too, after all.  Happiness loves fellow company.  If you have a request, make it known.  We'll go out of our way.  I'm going to buy a pint of skim milk tomorrow morning, after all, fully aware that most of that pint will be tossed in the trash come Monday trash day.

Use your melon

We went to Cowbell the other day.  It's a hamburger shack on the outskirts of the Riverbend, in Carrollton, at the farthest boundary of New Orleans proper, where New Orleans ends and Jefferson Parish, suburban sprawl, begins.  We probably won't have many guests who ask us about it.  It's not easy to get to.  It's worth a visit, though.  We went there twice, two days in a row, and your humble narrator isn't even much of a hamburger fan.  We went the second day to sample the vegetarian burger.  It was worth recommending.  In fact, we were talking to somebody yesterday, a vegetarian, and Frau Schmitt said, "You need to try the vegan Cowbell burger at Cowbell."  She's usually right about these things and she was this time, too.  That's the way most conversations go in our house. 

Cowbell is a quirky place.  It's got some nice original artwork in there, like the "Use Ya Melon" painting.  All the food and the cocktails are good.  Yes, cocktails for lunch.  This is New Orleans.

If you're looking for a B&B that has hosts who travel hither and yon throughout their fair city looking for the best that New Orleans has to offer, convenient or not, I have a place to recommend.  Is it like other New Orleans B&Bs?  We don't know.  I suppose they're all good.  That's what most of the reviews on Trip Advisor say, anyway.  It all depends on what you expect.  When you don't plan too much, you'll never be disappointed.  Be careful what you wish for...you might be ready for it, and then you, too, will fall in love with this magical city we call home.

Morning in New Orleans

That's the view I had when I was buying bread yesterday morning before any of our guests were awake.

You make your choice and you take your chances.  

We look forward to meeting you.

A votre santé,
La Belle Esplanade bed and breakfast.

What's beautiful about New Orleans?

Motorcycles in our back yard

We recently had a troop of motorcyclists from the United Kingdom (that's England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales, to you) who stayed with us for a couple of nights after making the "Music Tour" of Nashville, Memphis, Clarksdale, New Orleans.  We never know who is going to show up on our doorstep, but it's always a pleasant surprise.  They left early after breakfast and I snapped a photo of them suiting up with the sun streaming through the palm tree that's in the back gardens.

Then, I turned around and snapped a photo of the back of our inn:

An arrow points toward Heaven

The clouds have been breathtaking in the morning this autumn.  I've been taking pictures of them so that I can share them on the blog.  I know you have clouds where you come from, but everything is different in New Orleans...it's more magical.  That's the way I feel about it, at least, and I live here and I'm your humble narrator, so it's my opinion against yours.  We love living here.

I was in the gardens yesterday afternoon, and the Parisian couple who have been staying with us were taking the exact same photo.  They left this morning to tour Lafayette and other parts of the great state of Louisiana, but they asked if we have a room available when they come back to the city.  That's the kindest compliment of all.  We are very proud of our profession as innkeepers.  When people want to return, when they can't think of staying anywhere else in our fair city, well, that's the kindest compliment of all.  There is room at the inn.

Gayarre Place, New Orleans

The small triangular park in front of our house is called Gayarre Place.  It's named after the Father of Louisiana History, Charles Etienne Gayarre.  His grandfather was the first mayor.  Over the past couple of months, an anonymous art project has been underway.  An anonymous artist has been hanging identically generic signs that say "LOVE" all over the city.  It's been in the newspaper.  The other day, he or she finally got around to putting one of his or her signs in front of our house.  I like it.  Frau Schmitt thinks a nice addition to our stretch of Esplanade Avenue.  She is usually right about these things.

Crow in City Park, New Orleans

When I was walking the dog in City Park the other day, in the wide lawn in front of the art museum that's at the end of our street, I saw a raven.  I snapped a photo of that, too.

A view of breakfast at La Belle Esplanade B&B

I was walking the dog in City Park early in the morning, before the bakeries open.  We were on our way to Blue Dot Donuts, where we picked up a half dozen fruit-glazed cake donuts for breakfast; blueberry, strawberry and orange.  Then we went down to Alois Binder Baker to pick up a loaf of po' boy bread.  We were home before anyone was up, and Frau Schmitt worked her usual magic in the kitchen.  Good stories were swapped over good food that morning, they way they always are, every day, in our block of Esplanade Avenue.  At least, that's the way the days start in the big orange house with blue shutters.

If you are looking for a place to stay in New Orleans that marries good conversation with delectable eats, I have a place I can recommend.

A votre santé,
La Belle Esplanade bed and breakfast.
A Diamond Collection B&B.  

New Orleans Diamond Collection Inns

Official badge identifying BedandBreakfast.com's Diamond Collection members

We have permission to use that badge.  I wouldn't do it, otherwise.

You'll remember a week or so ago, I mentioned that we'd been personally inspected by a professional B&B inspector.  Well, we just got the news that we passed.  We exceeded the expected standards used to measure outstanding B&Bs in a city famous for its bed and breakfasts.  They aren't just New Orleans standards, they apply worldwide.

A Diamond Collection B&B

We're not ones to boast.  I don't think too, too much of it.  Frau Schmitt either, for that matter.  We're pleased of course, and we enjoy praise as much as the next person.  We also got a dollop of constructive criticism out of our inspection that we're going to put to good use to become better innkeepers.  Not everyone passes 100%.  Very few pass with more than what we scored.  It's affirming, but we're not ones to rest on our laurels.  

I've been reading a lot of articles about B&B entrepreneurs recently.  I'm a glutton for punishment and I'm not going to link to what I've read here.  There aren't many articles out there, truth be told, but they all boil down to the same thing: some people have the personalities to be innkeepers, while other people don't.  We fall in with the former.  We enjoy our profession.

Most B&Bs fail quickly.  We are entering our third year of operation with no sign of flagging interest or dedication.  We enjoy what we do.  We are looking forward to doing better.

This morning, we looked up the route of a second line parade that was going through our neighborhood today, and we shared the route with our guests.  If you want to sample a slice of New Orleans culture that isn't meant for tourists, you want to go to a second line.  If you don't know what a second line is, well, come on a Sunday.  Really, you should come on a Saturday, so that you are fresh to join in the parade on Sunday.  Then, stay the following Monday and Tuesday, leaving Wednesday.  You can stay longer, of course, and you should, but four nights should be your minimum stay.  Timing is everything.  

Whatever you choose to do, of course, is your own business.  We provide lodging and breakfast and recommendations.  What finally unfolds is due to your own decisions.  All of them will be right.  It is very hard to have a bad meal in New Orleans and it is well nigh impossible to be bored.

Right in the middle of Esplanade Avenue

It's nice to be recognized for being exemplary hosts.  If you read the reviews of our inn online, which I won't link to here, you'll read that we are personable innkeepers full of spot-on recommendations, and that our house is a jewel of a place in a wonderful neighborhood.  We ask that you don't believe everything you read, and that you do your due diligence before making a reservation with us.

I'm not going to lie.  Frau Schmitt is the nicest person you will ever meet.  We will take care of you to the best of our ability.  We offer good value at an honest price so that we can keep the place running and we won't nickel-and-dime with add-on charges, or try to sell you souvenirs.  We want you to enjoy our city the way we enjoy it, at a relaxed pace, never knowing what is going to happen next.  That's what it's like to live in New Orleans.

Remember, we don't know anything about you before you arrive.  Since we don't know you, it is impossible for us to recommend anything that you might enjoy beyond the generic.  We don't know you yet.  When you leave, we'll be friends.  Before you arrive, we are all only friends who haven't yet met.  Timing is everything.

We can't plan your itinerary cold every morning.  It's a collaborative effort.  You need to show up having done some homework, otherwise, we are going to do what the New Orleans Convention and Visitors Bureau does: we're going to send you to the French Quarter and Frenchmen Street.  We're members of the NOCVB, so we're familiar with their methods though we often disagree over the particulars.  There's nothing wrong with this modus operandi.  You should go to the Quarter and the Marigny Triangle, but we aren't going to tell you that the best best turtle soup is at Mandina's until we find out you aren't allergic to turtle meat and you're willing to go out of the way.

Yesterday evening, we recommended Chickie Wah-Wah to two of our guests.  They went.  At breakfast, they said, "That was the most fun we've had all year.  Thanks!"  We only recommended it after learning they had been to New Orleans twice before, recently, and they were ripe for something more like the locals do, something outside the tourism bubble.  Chickie Wah-Wah, voila.

A postcard view of New Orleans

We live in a real neighborhood that doesn't have many tourists wandering around.  People live here, whether they are visiting for a long weekend, or they are making their livelihoods here.  Everyone makes New Orleans better through their presence, their witness and their participation.  It's magical where we live, but we do not live in the French Quarter.  

If you want to spend all your time in the French Quarter, you should reserve a hotel room down there.  We're an intimate boutique inn that offers something else.  You get a taste of the real city when you stay with us.  We'll tell you all about it.

Over breakfast, we hope you'll tell us all about your adventures in our fair city.

Until that morning,
A votre santé,
La Belle Esplanade bed and breakfast.

Golf in New Orleans

An accidental movie

 I wanted to take a picture with my phone but it switched to video.  I hate when that happens.  Above, that's a video of the grass at my feet.  Fascinating, isn't it?  Welcome to New Orleans.

Abandoned snack bar in City Park, New Orleans

There used to be two golf courses in City Park.  Then there was Katrina, and you know what that did to most of the city.  Nowadays, one golf course has been restored and is open for business.  It has a driving range, too.

The abandoned golf course is in the middle of City Park, between Mirabeau Street and Fillmore Street, I think.  It's hard to tell what the landmarks are when you're in there.  It's a ghost course, filled with winding sidewalks that lead nowhere, past abandoned little buildings and alongside overgrown lagoons.  People say there are alligators up there, though I've never seen one.  People also say there are coyotes, but I haven't seen any of those either.  It's a fascinating place.

An abandoned rest room in City Park, New Orleans

If you are only going to stay for two or three nights in New Orleans, we're probably not going to recommend visiting the abandoned golf course in City Park.  Why?  Because there is just so much else to see.  When you get home, people aren't going to ask you if you went to the abandoned golf course.  They're going to ask if you went to Cafe du Monde or to Bourbon Street.  You should see these things, but please be aware that New Orleans is more than the tourist attractions in the French Quarter.  It's a living city.

Sometimes I like to say it's a living museum.  Everything is old here, even when it's new.  Everything is unique.  There is no place in America like New Orleans.  Dare I say there is no place in the world like this wonderful city we call home?  Okay.  I'll say it.

Both Frau Schmitt and I have visited many places all over the globe.  We've lived in a few of them, too.  New Orleans is like nowhere else.  We love it here.  If we didn't, we wouldn't live here. We'd be somewhere more romantic.  Unfortunately, there isn't any other city more romantic.  Not Paris.  Not Venice.  Not Rio de Janeiro.  Not New Haven, Conn.  Not Des Moines, Iowa.  Take your pick of places.  New Orleans beats them with unfettered and infectious and resilient sheer joie de vivre.   

A dog in City Park, New Orleans

Some people walk their dogs in the abandoned golf course in City Park because hardly anyone goes there.  When you have to go to Cafe du Monde or Bourbon Street, who wants to wander around an abandoned golf course?  Some people do.  Mostly it's people who live here.  It's peaceful up there.

I recently got an email that half of the abandoned golf course is going to be restored, retrofitted, and returned to commerce so that people can putt and score birdies in the "West Golf Course."  I have an idea of where they mean because nobody refers to the compass in New Orleans, so I'm only guessing.  I'm guessing that the repair work is going to be done on the Uptown side of the abandoned golf course.  We usually stick to the Downtown side when we walk the dog or just want to stroll around alone with our thoughts.  

I mentioned the restoration plans to Frau Schmitt, and also to Dorothy, who is the weekday bartender at the Parkview Tavern, and to Marsha, who is very involved in the tour guide business.  They all expressed regret that the abandoned golf course is going to join the list of things in New Orleans that ain't dere no more.  Of course, avid golfers have been thinking that the original links ain't dere no more, so it's the circle of life in a big vibrant city.   

If you want to stay for a longish while in New Orleans, in a real neighborhood out of the tourist bubble, and you want to learn what it's like to live here...I have an idea where you might want to stay.

A votre santé,
La Belle Esplanade bed and breakfast.